Monday, December 12, 2011

The Secret to Being Happy

These last 2 years have been ones of complete upheaval and change. I have failed, succeeded, conquered, lost, gained and learned a lifetime's worth in 24 short months. Throughout it all, the one thing that remained constant was my burning desire to be happy.

My whole life, I chased being happy. Always looking for that one thing or someone that will make everything better. I was convinced that if I could just find "the one" I would be okay. I went from relationship to relationship, even in my friendships. And all that pursuit got me was a whole heap of misery.

Because I was chasing the wrong relationship.

I spent all of my time trying to find the one person who would accept and love me for me, yet I wasn't even willing to give that to myself. It was only when I stopped searching for anything outside of myself that I began to understand what it takes to be happy. Now, that doesn't mean I don't need anyone else, humans are social creatures and we need friends and mates, however, my folly lay in needing someone else to make me happy.

That's impossible.

As fallible beings, it is not possible for one person, or even a handful, to make you happy all of the time.  We fail one another, sometimes even in times of greatest need. We make mistakes and we have a very bad tendency to inadvertently hurt one another. So by seeking fulfillment in others, all I was doing was setting myself up for failure.

I wanted someone to accept me for me all while refusing to do just that for myself. 

Imagine that you have a friend, and every time you see her, she criticizes your appearance. It starts off small like "You should do something different with your hair" or "You really need a pedicure." As time goes on, it escalates into "Wow, you really need to lose weight!" or "You never seem to have a good hair day, you know that?" Next thing you know, your friend is pointing out every skin blemish, even the tiniest roll or dimple of fat, how your clothes don't fit you just right, how those lines around your eyes are getting more noticeable, and how no one in their right mind would want to see you naked let alone love you after such a sight.

You wouldn't remain her friend, would you?

No, of course not. You'd stop returning her calls. Stop hanging out with her and tell all your other friends what a bitch she is. You would be downright pissed at her, and you'd have every right to be. Yet, every day, we say all of those things to ourselves when we look in the mirror. How can you expect to be happy when you are in an abusive relationship with yourself?

I had to stop seeing myself how I thought others saw me. Learning to stand in front of the mirror and admire myself was one of the biggest steps for me. I'd been taught to hate my reflection from early on in life, and it took a lot for me to learn to love the mirror. I started small, by focusing on the good things, and pretty soon, it was difficult for me to see how any of my flaws really made that much of a difference.

I accepted myself. More importantly, I loved myself.

I finally realized that I am worth being happy. I deserve to be happy. And I will continue to make the choices necessary to remain happy. Which means, if there are unhealthy things and/or people around me, I will choose to remove them from my life. I will not grant another person the power to decide whether or not I'm happy.

Which is exactly what I was doing by searching for a relationship to give me my happiness.

I see it everywhere I look; people desperate to find "the one". I understand, because I've been there. I've fallen in love too quickly before, simply because I was desperate to have what I thought was missing. I regret giving up so many years of peace because I was too stubborn to take a good, long look at myself.

It's easy to treat yourself badly. How often do you eat junk food to feel better, or stay up too late because you're trying to conquer some of that To Do list, or look at yourself with disgust every time you pass a mirror? Do you know the difference between your needs and your desires? How many times have you settled while dating because you're so lonely and you "need" someone?

Decide that you are no longer going to let your deficiencies define your worth. Look in the mirror and stop the running commentary in your head of how much you hate your body. Replace it with something you like about yourself and add to that list daily. Stop looking for the next relationship to change things and fix the one you're in with yourself. Attitude and behavior are choices, which means the power to change them lies completely within you. No one else has the power to make your life worth living, so stop giving it to them.

If you want to be happy, then be happy.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Viagra? We don't need no stinkin' Viagra...

I am not a medical professional, no matter how much time I seem to spend around them, so my advice should not be taken as such. That being said, I'd like to take a moment to formally diagnose you with NOT having ED.

That's right. I said YOU do NOT have ED in the sense that a magical pill or a Pos-T-Vac is going to fix everything, although the latter is a source of never ending humor for me. I'm sorry, but when you've turned to Hoover for sexual gratification, you took a wrong turn down the Dirt Devil aisle at the local Wal-Mart.

There are a lot of things that can cause a man to stop being able to function as a man, but when it comes to their dicks not working properly men, the logical gender, freaks out and dissolve into a raging pile of hormones enough to rival a tribe of amazons all on their period at the same time.

First things first, if your dick isn't working like it should with your partner, try a solid week of masturbation. If you can get it up for yourself, then let's look at the problem. It lies within your relationship with your partner. The attraction may not be there anymore. There may be unresolved issues between the two of you preventing you from feeling relaxed and free enough to share a raging hard-on with him/her. Emotional issues are the number one cause of a man's inability to maintain an erection, so you want to start there. Don't let things fester unless you're really looking forward to building cock callouses on your hand.

So, you've aired your grievances with your mate and things are getting better between you or you've decided it's too much and you've moved on. Either way, the next step is to see if you are able to achieve the desired Full Alert Status in a non-monologue setting.

Here's where the Pos-T-Vac will nab you if you don't have a partner who understands oral is the glue holding most relationships together. What am I saying? I'm saying to get down there and SUCK SOME COCK. Use your mouth to create the vacuum pressure needed to get that gorgeous penis hard. Swallow, rinse, repeat.

Problem solved.

For the rare people still affected by ED, consult your doctor to make sure it's not something more serious like diabetes or heart disease.

My point is simple. Instead of grabbing the latest blue pill or penis pump, use your other head to get to the root cause and fix that. You'll save yourself a lot of wear and tear on your insurance card and your ego.

Woman/gay men: Get. On. Your. Knees. And. Suck. Like. A. Champ. Show enthusiasm. Seduction and brutal freedom between partners is what makes love thrive. And when love is thriving, dicks only become limp after being drained by loving lips.

Viagra? We don't need no stinkin' Viagra.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

That Kind of Woman

As Christmas approaches, I've been thinking more and more about commercials like the one above. Not because I believe diamonds are the only way to show love, but because these commercials used to depress the fuck out of me.

I know you're now asking why a string of cheesy, materialistic, over-dramatic ads that help drain the soul of Christmas would affect me so.

For years, I was in a horribly abusive marriage, and one of his most effective tools in controlling me was to strip away any feelings of self-worth. So, when I watched those commercials, all I could think is, "I will never be the kind of woman that inspires a man like that."

It killed me.

Fast forward to now, and all of the steps I've taken to reclaim myself since kicking his sorry ass to the curb, and I realize I've ALWAYS been that kind of woman.

I make the following promises to myself:

1) I promise to never look in the mirror with loathing again.

2) I promise to admire my flaws and know that if someone doesn't find me worthwhile, that's not my problem.

3) Never again will I allow someone else to define how I feel about myself.

4) I promise to never waste time on someone who refuses to love themselves or me.

5) I promise to choose to be happy.

6) I promise to elevate those around me so they too can see their own worth.

7) I promise to never stop believing that I am worth more than all the diamonds in a stupid Kay Jewelers.

8) I promise to let go of the anger and regret as I walk on in my new life.

9) I promise to never sacrifice being myself ever again, because I'm pretty awesome.

What promises will YOU make to show that you are That Kind of Woman (or man)? Leave your promises in the comments so we can all celebrate them.

Every time you see one of those commercials, I want you to remember what you've promised yourself and act on it. You are the only one who can change things for you.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Winner of BJ Friday with Ava Riley!!!

Thanks to you all for your patience while I recover from my illness.

The winner of A LIFETIME TO FIND LOVE is Danielle Gorman!!!!

Congrats Danielle, and since you provided your email in the comments, Ava Riley will be sending you your digital copy. ENJOY!!!

Friday, April 22, 2011

BJ Friday Interview With Author Ava Riley

Ava Riley is a girl who is not afraid to let it all hang out! I think she may even tweet more about cock than I do. Okay, maybe that's stretching the truth a bit, but I just adore her and am so excited to have her on the blog for BJ Friday.

She just released her first erotic novella, A LIFETIME TO FIND LOVE.

Tessa has no desire to spend another Friday night alone. Inviting her brother’s best friend, Cade, to hang out with her at a local club was nothing more than a night out with a friend. At least that’s what she thought. When unexpected advances are made, they are both forced to evaluate their life-long friendship and newly revealed feelings for each other. Can Tessa accept that someone as sexy and successful as Cade could want her for more than sex? Will their friendship continue on as it was or will these two find a love that lasts a lifetime?

Alright, enough with the introductions, it's time to get down and dirty.

Alpha Pussy: How did you get started writing erotica?

Ava: I actually never thought about it until I started reading paranormal about 2 years ago. I just thought “wow, my mind is dirty enough to write like that.”

Alpha Pussy: I certainly won't argue with that. What authors would you say are your biggest inspiration and influences?

Ava: There are so many out there, but some of my favorites are Lara Adrian, Lyndsay Sands, Kresley Cole, and Jeaniene Frost.

Alpha Pussy: I love Jeaniene Frost. In fact, I just re-read the entire Night Huntress series. Book 2, chapter 32...shit, I just shorted out my keyboard...Do you ever get stuck while working on a particularly graphic scene? How do you get unstuck?

Ava: I wouldn’t say stuck, but I do have to take my time and make sure that everything is in order. I get caught up in the “moment” and a thousand things are running through my mind of what I want in the scene.

Alpha Pussy: A thousand dirty things? Sounds like a movie I'd love to watch...or star in. What’s your favorite body part to describe?

Ava: Oh this is easy, I would have to say the chest and ass (oh sorry that’s two body parts lol).

Alpha Pussy: Get with the program you cheater! Then again, extra ass is ALWAYS welcome on this blog. What’s your favorite synonym for cock?

Ava: Shaft (but I like cock too)

Alpha Pussy: I noticed Tess never complains when getting the shaft. *snickers* What about for pussy?

Ava: Core (hot wet core)

Alpha Pussy: So many responses flooded through my mind, I think my eardrums just popped. I love a woman who keeps it tastefully nasty. Tessa and Cade went on several romantic and perfect dates. What's your perfect date?

Ava: My perfect date would be a drive to the mountains and a picnic by a cool stream.

Alpha Pussy: And by picnic, I'm just going to assume you mean a multitude of feasting upon one another. That's either very sexy or very George Romero. A LIFETIME TO FIND LOVE is your debut. What's been the most exciting thing about being published?

Ava: The most exciting thing is hearing people say they love the book.

Alpha Pussy: Um, you're supposed to say being featured on BJ Friday with the Alpha Pussy. Sheesh, woman, where's your head? Oh, yeah, still lingering on the cock question. What's the most nerve-wracking thing about being published?

Ava: That people won’t like the book and seeing my first bad review.

Alpha Pussy: You should buy yourself a pair of sexy panties for every unfavorable review. That way you can train yourself to get excited about them. Has writing about sex improved your own sex life?

Ava: Well, my sex life is pretty damn good, so I would say that because of that, my sex scenes in my books has improved.

Alpha Pussy: I think that's the best answer to that question I've ever seen. How many of your scenes have you practiced in order to write them?

Ava: Only a few (so far!). My husband is a great research partner though.

Alpha Pussy: Lucky, lucky man. Tessa continually gets interrupted while trying to have a quiet morning with her favorite toy. Do you have a favorite toy?

Ava: Oh dear God yes, my JackRabbit! Best toy hubby ever bought me.

Alpha Pussy: What a good boy he is! Sounds like he deserves a BJ Friday reward. My first BJ was in high school out in the field behind the portable office…at a church. Tell me about your first BJ.

Ava: It wasn’t the best experience…I had no idea what I was doing and honestly I thought I would never do it again. He just shoved it in my mouth and I thought “what the hell am I supposed to do now.” But then I met hubby and we practice all the time and I LOVE it!

Alpha Pussy: It definitely improves the experience to have at least one person who knows what he/she is doing. What's next on your agenda? Lots more writing More writing or more sex?

Ava: My follow up to A Lifetime to Find Love, Sacred Surrender, comes out in July. This is Rowan’s (Tess’s brother) story. And there is always room for more sex (in books and life).

Alpha Pussy: OOH!!! I was hoping for a happy ending for Rowan. And of course there's always more room for sex...especially when you destroy a few pieces of furniture and a wall or two...Wrap it all up by giving your best tip for #BJFriday.

Ava: My first tip is to watch gay porn, that’s how I learned how to give a great BJ. Seriously, I’m not lying. Secondly, if you are uncertain as to whether you want it in your mouth or not, use flavored lube, makes it better for both and thirdly, take your time and enjoy the BJ. The more you enjoy it, the more he enjoys it.

Ava, thank you for the interview! Now, before I run off to watch gay porn (which I honestly do love), let's talk GIVEAWAY!!!

Enter to win a digital copy of A LIFETIME TO FIND LOVE. Contest ends Tuesday, April 26th.

Comment on this interview: 1 entry

Be a follower of this blog: 2 entries

Tweet the contest (be sure to include @thealphapussy for verification): 3 entries

Put this contest on your blog or Facebook and put the link in your comment: 4 entries

Tally it all up in your comment and good luck!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Winner of BJ Friday with Tracey O'Hara!!!

And the winner of Death's Sweet Embrace (as chosen using is WANDA F.

Congrats, Wanda!!!

Since you already included your email in your comment, I have already contacted you!

Friday, April 1, 2011

BJ Friday Interview with Tracey O'Hara

Tracey O'Hara is a true master of writing jump-off-the-page-into-my-bed-please heroes. Her novels are ones I finished in a page-turning frenzy, all while sending her DM's demanding to know when the next one is coming out. It's really a wonder she hasn't blocked me or at least taken out a restraining order. Of course, she did me one better by sending me a care package and triggering my addiction to white chocolate Tim Tams.

Is it any surprise I love that bitch?


The tension between the Aeternus, an ancient vampiric people, and humanity has been mounting for over a century. But when rogue vampires begin to drain humans in order to achieve an illegal blood-high, all bets are off.

After the death of her parents, Antoinette Petrescu devoted her life to becoming one of the top Venators, the elite hunters who destroy the rogue Necrodreniacs. Her kill count is legendary and her skills superb.

But now the serial killer who killed her parents has returned. And to stop him Antoinette must join forces not only with the Aeternus, but also their most legendary killer. One that is both dangerously attractive, and involved in buried secrets of her past. More dangerous still, a dark attraction grows between them--one that could doom both races.

Alpha Pussy: I love your book covers!!! You won a Ruby Award for your debut novel Night’s Cold Kiss. What was that experience like?

Tracey: One word – surreal. I never expected to final, let alone win. When they called my name, I could swear I’d misheard. It still doesn’t seem real, I have to touch the trophy every now and then to make sure I wasn’t just dreaming.

Alpha Pussy: Would it help if I pinched you every now and then as well? The world you write about has such a rich history. Did it take you hours of research or did you just wing it as you went along?

Tracey: The history just came along as the world revealed itself to me. The stuff I had to research was the American settings since I had never left my own country at that time.

Alpha Pussy: Next time you need that kind of research let me know. I will work for Tim Tams. Or ARCs. Who’s your favorite boy: Christian or Raven?

Tracey: Don’t ask me to choose – that isn’t fair. I guess Christian is my first, but Raven is a pretty hot number.

Alpha Pussy: Of course it's fair! I would have to go with Raven just for the hat alone. And the hair...and the eyes...oh hell, I'll take all of him. Tell me about the first sex scene you ever wrote. What is your hottest one so far and why?

Tracey: Okay the first sex scene I ever wrote is in Night’s Cold Kiss where Christian gets in on with a human donor. He feeds and has some pretty hot nooky on railing of the hotel penthouse suite balcony. But the hottest sex scenes are the erotica ones that I write under a different name.


After thousands of years of secret conflict, humans and parahumans have reached an uneasy truce. But unspeakable evil now threatens to shatter the tenuous peace.

Teenaged shapeshifters are being slaughtered by a twisted, sadistic serial killer who rips their still-beating hearts from their paralyzed bodies. A task force must be formed to halt the madness—a union of avengers including the vampiric Aeternus, Christian Laroque and Antoinette Petrescu, as well as Kitt Jordan and Raven Matokwe, members of enemy Animalian tribes…and forbidden lovers.

A centuries-old blood feud has divided their peoples—pitting wolf against snow leopard in a battle to the death—and if their passion is discovered it will doom them both. But past hostilities must be put aside in light of the scourge that is now upon them. For the killer they seek is but the first sign of a blossoming terror rising up from their long-buried pasts: the all-consuming nightmare of The Dark Brethren.

Alpha Pussy: As a fan of all your stories, I'll have to agree with you on that one. Is there a different process writing sex between two humans and writing sex between either a human and a para-human, or two para-humans?

Tracey: Not really. I have never written any animal sex so they all take place in human form, although a vampire will probably be just as fixated on feeding as fucking.

Alpha Pussy: *blinks* Animal sex? Now I feel all sleazy for asking that. Although...Raven... What’s your favorite synonym for cock?

Tracey: What is wrong with cock? It’s such a perfect word. Though I do say erection sometime.

Alpha Pussy: A woman after my own heart. I love the word cock. Has writing about sex improved your own sex life?

Tracey: Who has time for sex when you work 8 hours a day and your husband works nights.

Alpha Pussy: Oh honey. *passes you a Tim Tam* One of my recent brilliant ideas is Jolly Rancher cockrings. Which flavor would you choose?

Tracey: Okay – I have never heard of Jolly Rancher and had to look it up. I found this,Best-Jolly-Rancher-Flavors and decided I would pick cinnamon fire.

Alpha Pussy: Mmm...good choice. I'd go with that or watermelon. If you were to get snowed in with any one man of your choice, who would it be and why? Or will you be greedy and choose more than one?

Tracey: No – there is only one man for me, there has only ever been one man for me. And I married him.

Alpha Pussy: Smart man. Can I please have Raven for a weekend?

Tracey: You’ll have to fight Kitt for him. I mean, he is a pretty hot ticket. Plus I think he only has eyes for her, he is a one woman wolf :)

Alpha Pussy: I'm the Alpha Pussy, I can take her. The ending of Death’s Sweet Embrace twisted in a way I didn’t see coming. Bravo! First time I’ve been surprised by a story in a long while. How far in advance did you plot it out?

Tracey: I always knew how it would end. It was just getting there that was the journey.

Alpha Pussy: A journey which you're taking again with the third book in the series. Which I'm sure you're in desperate need for a beta reader. *bats eyelashes* Wrap it all up by giving your best tip for #BJFriday.

Tracey: Swallow.

Thank you, Tracey, for the Tim Tams and the interview! You never disappoint!

Check out Tracey's website,, for more information on The Dark Brethren series and to download DANTE RISING, the prequel to NIGHT'S COLD KISS.

Now for the chance to get your hands on Raven.

Enter to win a copy of DEATH'S SWEET EMBRACE. Contest ends Tuesday, April 5th.

Comment on this interview: 1 entry

Be a follower of this blog: 2 entries

Tweet the contest (be sure to include @thealphapussy for verification): 3 entries

Put this contest on your blog or Facebook and put the link in your comment: 4 entries

Tally it all up in your comment and good luck!

Saturday, March 26, 2011

It's Just a Word

It's just a word. Just one, small, single syllable word.

And yet this word destroyed me at age 4, again at 11 and more times than I can recall in my 20's. And here I sit in my 30's, torn and bleeding around the wound the word insists on opening in me over and over and over until I fear I have nothing left.

I can't remember the last time I was able to see that word without shuddering. Lately, it's become a full scale meltdown and all because of that one, stupid, insignificant word.

It's an ugly word, easily spat with the contempt it deserves. Often not enough in the face of those who wield it as their chosen weapon. Like my grandfather. He taught me the meaning of that word before I'd ever even heard it.

Those who never know anything other than Webster's Dictionary's Definition of the word have been spared a fate far beyond death. It is the conquering of not just a body but a mind and soul. It is the ultimate power play intrinsically designed to leave the conquered irreparably damaged.

There are so many days I walk through and breathe just fine, but it waits. On assassin's paws it creeps in slow circles. Crouching. Watching. Waiting to pounce at the first sign of happiness.

God, it is so hard to hold my head up right now. The word sits on my shoulders, pressing me to the ground, whispering in my ear, showing me things I never want to see. Memories.

I try to light the word on fire, to sweep away it's ashes, but find only the blisters singeing my own flesh. I welcome the pain because it is not the word. It is not the conquerors. It helps me feel. Yet, that way is lost to me now. Shoved away by promises I fight to keep.

My anchor, so far away, desperately clings to me. Tries to hold me as the word goes after our ties, one by one. He fights and pleads while I slip away and chase the silent world where the word does not exist.

I will the anger to return. To burn me from inside out. I'll become a crucible. You can scrape away the impurities. I promise I'll shine one day. And the next time the tarnish surfaces, you can hold me and we'll walk through this together.

The word wants in. Just like those who used it as a weapon on me came in. Tore me apart and left me bleeding. For now all I can do is walk forward. And when I can no longer walk, I will stand. And when it takes that from me, I will crawl. Towards the word. Towards all the word screams to me.

It will destroy me, just like it did so many times before, but this time I have my own weapon. And there is no one to wield this word's power on me but me. And after's just a word.

And I can say it without shuddering, without tears, without desperate panic, and maybe someday without blistering pain.


Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Winner of Maggie Nash Giveaway Announced!!!

And the winner is... MAI!!!!

Congrats Mai! You have the choice of either The Dream Master or The Master's Prize! Please leave your choice and your email in the comments so Maggie can get your book to you.

Friday, March 18, 2011

BJ Friday Interview with Maggie Nash

Maggie Nash sets a page on FIRE when she writes. She's become a very dear friend and after reading her stories, I couldn't WAIT to get her onto my blog and strip


Police detective Helena Peters has been secretly in love with her partners for years. It doesn’t help that he never looks at her as anything other than his work partner. What would he do if he discovered what she was really thinking?

His classic Greek looks were responsible for Dimitri Michaels’ arrogant success with women, so going undercover and pretending to be lovers with Helena should be a piece of cake, but she isn’t the person he thought she was.

Why was the only girl in his dreams now the only one who’d been right under his nose for years? More to the point, can he keep her safe long enough to convince her what he feels for her isn’t an act?

Alpha Pussy: How did you get started writing erotica?

Maggie: Kind of by accident actually. I’d written my first novel, which was a romantic suspense that I dreamed of being the first Harlequin Intrigue set in Australia. Alas, it was not to be. I was totally gutted by my first ever rejection of my first ever novel (Yes, I did have a thin skin!). in a fit of outrage on my own behalf I decided I would sell that damn book or die trying, so I sent it along to an E-Publisher a friend of mine was already published with. The Executive editor requested the book almost immediately, but asked me if I could “sex it up a bit” before I sent it to her. Ahem. Sex it up? Moi? Sure I could. Maybe.

So I wracked my brain about how to add some hot sex to a straight romantic suspense without embarrassing myself, then I remembered a couple of trips my dh and I had made Kings Cross in Sydney. The clubs there are pretty wild, and a hot scene in a strip club we’d seen inspired me to write my own version. Poor Beth and Daniel (my main characters) were already dying from the sexual tension, and this live sex scene tipped them over the edge. The relationship changed after that of course, so I rewrote the rest of the book to include lots more hot sex, and although not a true erotic romance, it was fairly explicit. I found out that I LOVE writing hot. It was just a simple step to graduate to erotic romance and erotica after that. I’ve been hooked every since.

Alpha Pussy: Well, you certainly hooked me right away. I wanted to kick Morpheus’ ass throughout THE DREAM MASTER. Where did you get the idea for an erotic story in a cult setting?

Maggie: Originally I wrote THE DREAM MASTER in response to a call for submissions for books with a “Dream” theme. So I thought “What if someone manipulated dreams for evil gain?” and then “What if this villain was a cult leader? “ and of course so many cult leaders are associated with using sex as a method of control, so what’s a suspense turned erotica junkie to do?

Alpha Pussy: I love how your mind works! Immediately your "what if's" turn to malevolence and SEX!!! No wonder we're friends. What’s your favorite body part to describe?

Maggie: I would have to say a character’s smile. That includes their eyes, facial expressions, dimples, mouths…lips, and all the stuff that lets you know what sort of person they are.

Alpha Pussy: I'm particularly fond of lips. Dimitri is one very incredibly hot detective. .. I just forgot the question. Have you ever had a police officer? Fireman? Doorman? Some kind of man in uniform?

Maggie: Yep, I love Dim. He was just so much fun to write. Tall, dark, handsome playboy. Oh, was there a question? Ummm. Let’s just say I once spent a week at the Fire Brigade training center learning to be a Fire and Safety Officer. The teachers were all firemen. *happy sigh *. Then there are 3 pairs of handcuffs in the toy drawer.

Alpha Pussy: *blinks slowly* Next time, you'd better call me or this whole thing is OFF! I can just imagine the cock party that would be. Speaking of, what’s your favorite synonym for cock?

Maggie: Being an Aussie, I do tend to use Aussie slang sometimes, so “dick” is a word I have been known to use once or twice. I also think that occasionally a name isn’t necessary. If you imagine the whole person joining with another person that they feel a connection to, then a word for a body part isn’t needed. But what the heck, I do like cock.

Alpha Pussy: I LOVE COCK!!! What about for pussy?

Maggie: Pussy works for me most of the time. I don’t use cunt much, but that’s just a personal choice. I’m writing an erotic historical series at the moment, and I’ve been researching words used in Victorian times so lately I’ve been using words like“ quim” and “cunny”.

Alpha Pussy: *giggles* You're a cunny quim! Yes, I'm 12. Deal with it. The strawberry. You mentioned extensive research? Explain, in painstaking DETAIL!

Maggie: How did I know you were going to ask this one? LOL! It was pretty easy - I love strawberries and I love sensation play, so I figured cold and tasty would be pretty interesting to try. I actually wrote the scene first, then the man read it. He immediately decided we HAD to try it for ourselves so he booked a cabin for a romantic weekend so we could have complete privacy away from the kids. Let’s just say I was right! It is a great combination, but my tip – use a plastic sheet! Suffice to say we left a lasting impression on the mattress. LMAO!

Alpha Pussy: I already require a plastic sheet (you should see the wet spot poor PW has to sleep in) so that's already taken care of. I can't WAIT to try the strawberry. The publishing world is really picking up in Australia. What is your advice to fledgling writers both there and world wide?

Maggie: E-books are really taking off in Australia at the moment, and romance fiction is only now being recognized by publishers as a top selling genre. However, Australia remains a small market. The Holy Grail is still US and in particular NY publishers. The potential sales are so much higher, and in reality, romance fiction is more accepted in the US than here in Australia.

My advice for any writer is to first hone their craft. Write as much as they can, read widely to know their market, and make sure they research where they want their book to be. It’s also important to speak to other authors and writers and learn from their experience. Join online communities, writers associations etc. Writing is a solitary exercise, but you don’t need to be alone. There are plenty of wonderful and generous writers out there who can and will support you and guide you as you strive to reach your goal. Of course the main thing is to never give up.


What happens when a conservative girl sneaks in to a BDSM club for a look and makes an impression on the Master trainer? He pulls out all stops to claim her for himself.

A radio charity auction gives Mitch Collins just the opportunity he was looking for. When he claims his prize, a mind-blowing kiss confirms all his fantasies and leaves him determined to win her trust.

Elise Blake can't believe she has to kiss a stranger for charity. To make things worse, the man who claims her kiss is the training Master from Club Fetish, the BDSM club she'd visited on a dare. Her secret fantasy scared her to death so why did his masterful ways prove so irresistible?

Alpha Pussy: Has writing about sex improved your own sex life?

Maggie: Hell yeah!

Alpha Pussy: And this is why I absolutely adore you! Your heroines have the unfortunate habit of blushing and revealing their true feelings. Is this a trait you share as well?

Maggie: *Blush * Um. Yes. Must be my Catholic school upbringing. LOL. It’s not always intentional, but I am pretty sure there is a lot of me in all of my heroines.

Alpha Pussy: Catholic school? The naughtiness is all starting to make sense now. I’ve always been curious about vanilla writers who write BDSM. What inspired you to write THE MASTER’S PRIZE and did you at least get/give a few real spankings for the sake of research? Perhaps a good flogging?

Maggie: I think I was about twelve years old when I started fantasizing about bondage, submission, and being totally under someone else’s control. I didn’t have a clue what BDSM was of course, and I suppose I thought I was a bit weird, because I never actually shared my fantasies until I met my dh. I remember being aroused by certain scenes in movies and wondering if everyone felt the same way as I did.

There’s this scene in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid where Robert Redford orders Katherine Ross to strip at gunpoint. O.M.G. I was hot for hours after that one! I so wanted to be her…and I was barely in my teens. Another one that freaked me out was a movie where a stalker kidnapped women and tied them to a bed before gently touching them all over. He was obviously a deviant, but I got off on thinking about being tied up and being touched in all my intimate places and not being able to stop it. I thought I was definitely a sicko after that one! In fact, you are the first person I’ve ever told that.

So I guess what I’m saying is, BDSM has always been something that’s interested me. It wasn’t until I discovered erotic romance that I realized exactly what it was that I was reacting to, and even though I can’t say for sure that I am a true submissive, I know the idea of gifting my complete trust to someone who will take control and care for me is a huge turn on. It was because of this interest that I decided to write my own story, and set about researching all over the Internet. I wanted to get it as right as I could given that I wasn’t an active member of the BDSM community, or even sure of what I was doing with my partner. I read recommended sites, blogs, and was lucky enough to meet a few practicing lifestylers, one who beta read THE MASTER’s PRIZE for me. She lives as a sub in a Dom/sub relationship and was able to give me some guidance as to the realism of the relationship. In writing THE MASTER’S PRIZE I know I’ve discovered so much about myself and I plan more stories where I can pour out my thoughts, feelings and fantasies.

I did buy lots of toys and equipment along the way, and the man and I have been known to try most of them *happy grin*. Have I had a spanking? Not a proper one, as the man is a bit shy, but one day I’ll convince him! I haven’t been brave enough to attend a Munch or try one of the private play parties or clubs around where I live but who knows? I did find out where they are. LOL, Maybe one day.

Alpha Pussy: Understanding the gift of trust and how erotic that is for both sides is key. I think you're well on your way to exploring your submissive side. What’s your most embarrassing moment?

Maggie: Oh, there’s so many! Geez. Okay, there was this one time when the man and I were newlyweds. Let’s just say I was tied up *grins * Long story short…there’s a knock on the door and some friends of ours started calling out to us to open up. The man tells them to hang on a sec, but it took a bit too long to liberate said tied up person. Our friends offered to go walk around the block to give us more time, but oh no, the man tells them to wait. Finally we let them in and even though I was fully dressed I felt totally naked and totally red while they smiled knowingly at me and stayed for HOURS talking and drinking coffee with us. It was years before they stopped bringing that one up!

Alpha Pussy: Oh, you ARE a little submissive slut, aren't you? Do you have a favorite toy?

Maggie: It’s a toss up between my Jack Rabbit and these nipple huggers. The nipple huggers can hide under my bra all day and only I know they’re there, but nothing beats a great clit stimulator. Tough decision. Oy! Is it hot in here?

Alpha Pussy: I just ordered a few more toys because I keep wearing mine out. My first BJ was in high school out in the field behind the portable office…at a church. Tell me about your first BJ.

Maggie: I was a bit of a late bloomer…I was already married when I gave my first BJ. Of course I was a child bride. LOL. The circumstances I’m a little vague on. Surprising as it might sound, given the way I’ve spilled my guts in this interview, but I was pretty conservative for a long time. I don’t think I started thinking seriously about them until I began my love affair with erotic romance. So all those before that probably didn’t count. I know a lot more now than I did then.

Alpha Pussy: I love bringing out the corruption in others, especially a woman as hot as you. How many of your scenes have you practiced in order to write them?

Maggie: Strangely enough, it’s usually the other way around. I write them first, using my naughty imagination, then the man and I try them out to see if they’re as good as I thought they were when I dreamed them up. The Man loves to read all my books so I let him choose which scenes he’d like to re-enact.

Alpha Pussy: HOLY FUCK that's an incredible idea! Maybe I'll give PW a treat and let him pick one or two scenes. Wrap it all up by giving your best tip for #BJFriday.

Maggie: Don’t forget you have two hands as well as a mouth. Use them.

Thank you so much for that amazingly honest and smoking hot interview, Maggie! I am now crowning you the Saucy Aussie!

To buy Maggie's books, visit her website here: or look her up on

Check out the comments as Maggie has generously offered to give away one of the books mentioned here, just answer her question in the comments! Good luck!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

BJ Friday with Melissa Ecker Winners Announced!!

Thank you all for your entries! Using, the following winners were selected:

Dale Ealey: Pull the Trigger

Ava Loengard: Deep in the Heat of Texas

Congratulations, Dale and Ava! Please leave your email in the comments so Melissa and I can get your book to you.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

BJ Friday with Author Melissa Ecker

Melissa Ecker is a woman who knows the power of her boobs, and she's not afraid to use them! I first started following her on Twitter last year when she tore apart some douchebag who blasted her for not responding to his pervy advances. Since then, I've come to adore and respect her as a genuine friend. I recently read some of her incredibly HOT stories and knew she'd be a perfect candidate for BJ Friday.

I love being right.

So grab your favorite cock or toy and settle in for a sexy interview and a chance to win one of Melissa's books!


Rebecca Harper is making a clean break. The ink is dry on her divorce decree and her dream job has finally come to fruition. In two weeks, she will be on a plane to St. Louis. All her plans are set until sexy cop Justin Cain, her former high school crush, asks her to dinner. This one night out instigates a roller coaster ride of hot sex, serious soul searching and heart breaking decisions. Will Rebecca leave Justin behind to follow her dreams? Or will his love be enough to keep her in Memory Grove?

Alpha Pussy: How did you get started writing erotica?

Melissa: It was by accident, really. I was looking over a publisher's website and saw that they were looking for erotic submissions following a particular theme. I thought, why not? So, I set out to write a menage which ended up being Pull the Trigger. Part way into writing it, the love story was just too strong and I ejected the third party.

Alpha Pussy: Excellent decision. You can feel the organic growth of the love between Rebecca and Justin, although, she did check out Luke's package. I noticed a trend of your heroines having tag team fantasies. If you could have your very own cock party, who would you want for your own tag teaming?

Melissa: Oh, this is easy! Jeremy Shockey and The Rock.

Alpha Pussy: HOLY HELL WOMAN! You don't mess around. Damn...I think I may need a quick toy break. Do you ever get stuck while working on a particularly graphic scene? How do you get unstuck?

Melissa: Usually, when I'm writing graphic scenes they flow really well. It’s almost like real sex. I start with some fantastic foreplay and it naturally progresses to the happy ending. I rarely get...umm...stuck. If I do, I get up and walk around or look at Tumblr and that usually gets me back in the groove.

Alpha Pussy: Your scenes definitely read like real sex, the fantastic kind that is. What’s your favorite body part to describe?

Melissa: I love describing my heroes' arms. There's something so sensual and erotic about strong arms and bulging biceps. I also like to look at big, masculine hands. Wait…you were asking what I liked to describe…

Alpha Pussy: Big hands sliding up my legs, down my back, across my stomach, dipping down...I'm sorry, where were we? What’s your favorite synonym for cock? What about for pussy?

Melissa: Well, cock is such a fun and versatile word but shaft is my favorite alternative. It sounds so completely unyielding and powerful. As for pussy, substituting cunt works for me. This word combines dirty, smutty and hot! And it makes me giggle-snort.


Los Angeles Times reporter, Maggie Wright, is assigned to do a story on the dying dude ranch industry in the south. When the newspaper offers to foot the bill for Maggie and her two friends, Payton Evans and Sophia Foster, to stay at the legendary Weston Ranch in Valentine, Texas, they jump at the opportunity. While it’s not the Caribbean cruise they wanted, how bad could it be?

Expecting a tired farm with dusty old cowpokes, the three big city friends are taken by surprise when they’re each assigned to a dashing cowboy or two for some good, old fashioned ranch training and a whole lot of rough riding. Their limits are tested in ways they never imagined, both in the bedroom and out on the range. After two weeks, will the women run back to the bright lights of Los Angeles without so much as a backward glance? Or will these skilled cowboys have them longing to stay for just a little bit more of their Texas-style heat?

Alpha Pussy: *still laughing over you loving the word cunt* Drake is extremely dominant. Do you prefer your men to be fully in control?

Melissa: I've always been on the shy side. I know...hard to believe. *laughs* So, I definitely prefer the aggressive alpha-type who is willing to take the lead and test my boundaries.

Alpha Pussy: I like having my boundaries tested, but only when I'm the one holding the whip. I love the flaws your characters have. It makes them very real and easy to step into their world and experience their stories. Who is your favorite voice to write so far?

Melissa: Thank you, sweetheart! Actually, the heroine in the novel I'm working on now is my favorite. Carolina is funny and quirky and is probably the character that most closely resembles me. I identify with her eccentricities, her insecurities and her sense of humor, so she's easy to write.

Alpha Pussy: I can't wait to read her book then! Has writing about sex improved your own sex life?

Melissa: I would say yes. Writing erotica has been liberating and I no longer burp soap bubbles when I write the word cock. Also, it has helped me to shed some inhibitions and try out something different. Overall, it has been an awesome experience and, believe it or not, I'm still learning new things!

Alpha Pussy: Shedding inhibitions, especially when it comes to cock, is such an exhilarating experience! And I want to hear about the new things you've learned. In Vivacolor! How many of your scenes have you practiced in order to write them?

Melissa: This question makes me smile. I wouldn't say I practiced in order to write them. But, I have reenacted some scenes!

Alpha Pussy: Funny, because next time I'm with PW I'll be reenacting a few as well. Both Payton and Rebecca are blondes. Do blondes really have more fun?

Melissa: I can't speak for all blondes, but this one does! As do my blonde heroines.

Alpha Pussy: I'm only half blonde, but I've had more fun as with black hair, but maybe I'll let the blonde grow out and we'll see. Do you have a favorite toy?

Melissa: Yes! The Rabbit. Bunny love...

Alpha Pussy: That reminds me, I need to replace my bullet vibe... My first BJ was in high school out in the field behind the portable office…at a church. Tell me about your first BJ.

Melissa: I'm a little fuzzy on the details but I think it was in the car on my birthday after overindulging on Boone’s Farm. I'm guessing it wasn't my best work. *smiles*

Alpha Pussy: I should've asked you about your second one. Explain to me your sock fetish.

Melissa: I'm not sure I can explain it. I’ve loved socks for as long as I can remember. I adored the frilly ones with lace around the cuffs or the longer ones with hearts and rainbows on them. As an adult, I realized I can't write barefoot. I have a huge collection of cute knee socks to keep me motivated! #HappyFeet

Alpha Pussy: I have PowerPuff Girl ones. Which I will shoot to kill over. Wrap it all up by giving your best tip for #BJFriday.

Melissa: This tip goes out to the guys who would like more #BJFriday action...don't forget a woman's mind is a very strong erogenous zone. Please be able to carry on a coherent conversation. I'll leave you with my personal motto: "If you can't turn my brain'll never get my panties off."

Thank you so much for making me wet, Melissa! To find out more about Melissa than even I could get her to divulge and to purchase her perfect-for-reading-in-the-bathtub-with-a-Bathing-Buddy books go here:

Now for the giveaway!


Comment on this interview: 1 entry.

Be a follower of this blog: 2 entries.

Tweet this interview and include @thealphapussy in the tweet so I'll know: 3 entries.

Tally up your entries and post it in your comment. Melissa has generously offered to give away a copy of Pull the Trigger AND Deep in the Heat of Texas so we will have two lucky winners!

I will pull the winners on Wednesday, March 16th.

Good luck and good BJ's!

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Stop Humping My Leg

I was raised with manners, and I firmly believe everyone should behave politely and with general courtesy to strangers and acquaintances. (Friends and loved ones are fair game, but I'll save that for a different blog post.)I am a relatively nice person. I believe people should treat one another with respect and dignity and a good smattering of kindness. You never know when saying hello, being friendly or just simply smiling at someone will make a huge difference.

So, if I'm nice to you in person or online, understand it comes from genuinely wanting to be nice.

It, however, is NOT an open invitation to hump my leg.

It absolutely floors me the disrespect I have been encountering recently. Call me naive, but when someone clearly is in a relationship, they are off limits. If you hit on me online or don't respect the fact that I am with PW, I will call you out. Very publicly and with as much venom as I can. Hence the Hall of Douchebaggery to your right.

I don't mind being complimented, what person does? But know where the line is.

And if you don't, I'll help you draw it...with a shovel.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

BJ Friday: A Pussy Fairytale

A year ago, this very night, I found my soulmate.

Sounds simple and happily ever after, doesn't it? Well, it kind of almost is, but it's no fun if you leave out all the messy parts. So let's go back to that night 1 year ago...

It had been several months since I'd finally told the ex I was done and wanted a divorce. I had decided I wouldn't date for at least a year, because, honestly, I didn't care if I ever found a man again. I was free.

That night was odd. When I got home from work, I figured I'd shower so I didn't have to get up as early the next morning. While this wasn't the odd part (I'm a Virgo, hygiene is very important to me), the hour or two spent walking around my house buck-ass naked was. I really had no reason to, and it was very out of the norm for me (considering I'd just spent my last 12 years being repressed by the ex), but there I was, strutting around enjoying my sumptuous flesh.

After I showered, I checked my Twitter page. And discovered I had a DM from none other than @PussyWhisperer. He and I had been following one another on Twitter for a few months. My opinion of him started off pretty poor due to the non-stop gushing of one of my friends. There was an entire weekend where she did nothing but talk about him, so I just chalked him up to one of her admirers she was fond of collecting. It took me several weeks to finally follow him. In fact, I didn't until my friend read aloud one of his tweets that was horrendous...and I had the perfect comeback to. We exchanged several tweets that night and, I must admit, I was impressed by his ability to keep up with me. We didn't talk too many times after that, however, he did send me a DM stating that he was honored to have such a sexy woman following him.

Yeah, I thought it was a crock of playa shit too.

Then, one fateful February night, he opened up on Twitter and told everyone how it was his 39th birthday and he had just been in the middle of his school final when something had glitched and his time ran out so he was going to fail his class. My friend jumped in and asked him if he wanted a pic of MY ass to make him feel better.

His exact response was, "YUSS, YUSS, YUSS!!!"

Mine? "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

A few days went by and I saw my friend for the weekend. She convinced me to let her take a pic of my ass (fully clothed), but I wouldn't let her send it to PW.

Several hours and an entire bottle of wine later, I relented and let her send it. A fact which mortified me the next day when I remembered.

We didn't hear anything for days and I just figured he didn't give a shit. Then came the naked strutting night and his DM. What follows is a transcript of that conversation...or rather a paraphrasing due to having to go from memory:

PW: OMFG!!! You have an ass to be worshiped!
Me: Then get on your knees, baby.

After which several DMs were sent from both of us which I don't exactly remember, but I do remember this part.

PW: (something about being on his knees and my pussy)
Me: I'd love to get on my knees and return the favor.
PW: Head should be earned, not given.
Me: (exact quote) Oh honey, I don't GIVE head, I fucking PERFORM. I'll make you come so hard your ears will ring for days.
PW: (after tweeting in stream about someone just flooring him with the hottest thing he'd ever read) Have you ever had phone sex?

Now, I must stop here and note that it was very outside of the norm for him to be so forward.

Me: No. I'm really rusty in the whole sex area.
PW: You wouldn't have to do anything, just listen to a story and cum. (there were a few more DM's that I don't remember)
Me: Okay, fine, you talked me into it.

We exchanged names and phone numbers and he said he'd call in a little bit because he had to finish up taking care of a few things first. I was freaking out. I can't believe I'd just given my phone number to him and was planning to have PHONE SEX!!! I nearly DM'd him and said to delete my phone number and forget it. I didn't do this kind of thing. Soon after, my phone rang and my heart was pounding.

And I was still naked.

I answered and we spent a few minutes of nervous chit least nervous for me, and then something clicked. We really started talking. Within 15 minutes he commented about how easily he could see himself getting addicted to my giggle. Hours went by without us even noticing the time. I can't recall all of what we talked about, with the exception of me telling him that "I have fantastic tits". It took us almost 5 hours to actually get to the phone sex.

I came HARD--as all of my neighbors, including the ones in China, can attest to. We finally had to get off the phone since I had work in the morning (not to mention the ex and I were still in the same house at the time and he would be home from work soon and I didn't want to deal with any bullshit), but PW asked me if he could call me the next night. I said the ex would be home, so he said, "What about the next night, or the next?" We were both hooked.

Neither one of us were looking for anything, but we couldn't stop talking...or stop having sex. I would shut myself away in a room and we would talk all night. He would call me at work. He sent me flowers. I sent him pics--slowly coming to trust him to send him more and more sexy ones until one day I finally took all kinds of naked ones and sent them.

I was the one who slipped up and told him I loved him first. Of course, I didn't realize I'd said it because I was talking about how people are supposed to treat those they love and managed to say that's what I felt for him in the middle of my rant. He had to stop me and ask if I realized what I'd just said. I said, "No." When he told me, all I could do was respond, "Oh."

Don't worry, he said he loved me too. With this ass, how could he not?

It wasn't long after that we made our relationship public.

PEOPLE FREAKED! Including my friend who had a "hand" in us getting together. She pulled me aside and told me, "you know, he likes CURVY women, right?" WTF am I, bitch? A stick? Yeah, I know you think I'm fat, but don't push your body issues on me. We unwittingly caused a lot of drama. By the time everything settled, one of the women who at first was jealous wound up becoming a good friend, and my "friend" told people she wanted PW and I to "crash and burn" because I "need to feel that pain."

We planned to meet in person and took things slow. Our initial plans fell through due to me winding up in the hospital to have emergency gallbladder removal surgery, however, we finally were able to meet on Halloween. At that point, we'd solidified our relationship, even most of the rules of our FLR, and were very anxious to make things official. Real. Tactile.


When we finally met, we couldn't stop kissing and touching. We were like two teenagers, making out on his bed before we even left the house for the hotel room.

We both had a LOT of oral skill bragging to live up to. And I had quite a few sexy outfits to wear...and a new flogger to try out.

So, did I live up to my promise to make his ears ring for days? I performed so fucking amazing he had a multiple and came three times in a row. I couldn't keep his cock out of my mouth and he couldn't keep my pussy and ass out of his. We brought a ton of movies to watch that week and only made it through one. And the night I wore the school girl uniform and got a facial...

I wish I could be with him tonight, making love, shoving his face in my pussy, demanding he pay tribute to my ass and making up for all those BJ Fridays we've spent apart. We are working toward that goal and will one day spend our lives together.

For now, I'm finishing up this blog so I can go have mind-blowing phone sex with my man, my pet, my love, my soulmate.

I leave you with my BJ Friday tip: suck that cock like you love it. Lick it, tease it, and for fuck's sake, make noise and look him in the fucking eye while you've got it in your mouth.

Friday, February 25, 2011

BJ Friday with Author Lynne Roberts

Lynne Roberts KNOWS sexy! The first time I read one of her stories (and I was critquing at the time so it wasn't even a finished product!) I had to grab a toy and sneak off afterward. Her latest story, CREATIVE LICENSE, contains one of THE hottest BJ scenes I've EVER read--it even gave ME ideas. Here's a closer look at CREATIVE LICENSE.

Loose ends have a way of tripping you up…

Years ago, a law school graduation weekend in Vegas had been part of Lily MacPherson’s plan. Waking up next to a naked Adonis with a ring on her finger was not. After a quick annulment, she relegated Caleb Anderson to her late-night fantasies—and very short list of mistakes—until his voice on the other end of the phone asks a favor that could shake the foundations of her neat and tidy future.

Caleb is still haunted by Lily’s horrified expression that morning in Vegas. At least it had made it easy to set her free…except they aren’t. The papers were never filed. And when the nosy patroness who could launch his painting career insists on meeting his “wife”, does he confess, or call Lily? He calls Lily.

When she steps off the plane, Caleb’s determination to play tour guide disappears in the San Francisco fog. Lily thought she could keep up the pretense for one weekend, cut the last tie to her past, and move on. But their chemistry still pops and sizzles, finally exploding into passion at Caleb’s studio.

It’s everything they remember…but so is the yawning chasm of differences that, in the end, could once again drive them apart.

Product Warnings

Contains balmy ocean breezes, coffee as seduction, the creative use of melted chocolate, and naughty shower lovin’ that gives new meanings to the term “shower head”.

Now you understand just how excited I was to kick off my BJ Friday Interviews with Lynne and she certainly didn't disappoint.

Alpha Pussy: You have several top selling stories. How did you get started writing erotica?

Lynne: I’ve been writing fantasy since 2005 but having little luck placing anything with an agent. A good friend of mine wrote erotica so I read some of hers out of curiosity. I was challenged. I’d never written a sex scene let alone used the words, ‘pussy’ or ‘cock’ in a story. At the time I was a little frustrated with hitting the publishing brick wall so I decided to write an erotic story of my own just to see if I could. When it, FIRST DATE, was done, I sent it to my friend, who told me to sub it. I did and it was contracted. I immediately wrote AFTER HOURS and the rough draft for HOOKING UP and CREATIVE LICENSE. Due to a family tragedy, I had to reduce my writing/editing time and there’s a year between AFTER HOURS and CREATIVE LICENSE’s release dates.

Alpha Pussy: I'm sorry, I know that was a rough time for you. But apparently what doesn't kill us turns us into sex fiends. What’s your favorite body part to describe?

Lynne: Shoulders, no… thighs… no, I think maybe the stomach. We are talking a male body part, right? LOL I love the male body. I love the curve of muscle and they way they glide under the skin when a man moves. The one area I’ve never accurately described, so it’s never ended up in my books, is that area where the hip and pelvis meet. A man’s hips are a work of art! The triangle of muscle that frames the dusting trail of hair leading to… well, I’m getting carried away. ; )

Alpha Pussy: Oh, by all means, please continue. I think all of my readers just turned up their vibrators. How many different words for cock and pussy have you used in a single story?

Lynne: Ai! Okay, would you believe I have a file of them? I prefer the synonyms for cock. I never much liked the word ‘cunt’, even though I’ve used it. It has a vulgar feel…. I know, you might disagree… and I refuse to use anything flowery like honeypot, which narrows it down. Realistically, there needs to be at least 4 or 5 in each story or it sounds repetitive…. I tell you, when I edited FIRST DATE the first time, I made a list of where each word was… I kept it. Although this is fictional, it looks like this:
- Pussy: Page 2,5,15,15,15, 24,26,28,28,28
- Cock: Page 4,5,7,8,8,9,15,15,
- Shaft: Page 15,15,28,28

Alpha Pussy: Only a fellow Virgo would keep a file like that. And I'm not much for the word 'cunt' unless someone truly earns that title. Honeypot? *falls over laughing* How many scenes of Creative License have you put into real life practice? Which is by far your best experience?

Lynne: Okay, this is so tame…. I’ve eaten the chocolate sundae Lily and Caleb shared in Ghirardelli’s and let me tell you, it’s a great experience! However, I read my work aloud to my man and I stopped at the chocolate body paint scene, because, well, I didn’t want to give it away…

Alpha Pussy: That is tame! No wonder you write this so well. You've got to get out of your head once in a while and live this stuff! I'm going to assign you to do some Show & Tell with your man for the body paint. In fact, I think I'll take that assignment myself, however, I'll have him painting me. Tell me about Caleb, and be very specific.

Lynne: What is there to tell about Caleb? He’s perfect… and he’s not. He’s down to earth, creative, passionate, talented, sexy as hell, giving, he can cook, did I mention he’s sexy? He’s silly, he’s witty, he loves life. I loved describing his shoulders et al. ; ) When I developed Caleb, and that sounds almost strange because he almost appeared fully formed in my mind, I didn’t hold back. I decided to make him the ideal man. For me, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have flaws. (ugh, hate that double ‘doesn’t’) I’d hate a perfect man because well, I’m not and neither are my characters. But I’ll let you decide. Is Caleb your ideal man?

Alpha Pussy: Now I'm wondering which part of Caleb's form appeared fully in your mind first? One of the aspects I love the most about your writing is the heat and incredible passion so evident between your hero and heroine. Care to share a bit about your writing process?

Lynne: Oh wouldn’t you like to know? LOL Honestly, it’s all my imagination. I usually start with a concept, or a scene. Then let my imagination play the ‘what if’ game. CREATIVE LICENSE almost didn’t get written because I thought the original concept (married in Vegas—divorce didn’t go through) was cliché. Oddly enough, that concept isn’t a big player in the story. This is one of my favorite books. Once I have the characters, I start torturing them. ; ) I come up with all sorts of ideas to keep them apart; personality quirks, hang-ups, needs, desires. In this book, Lily took more effort than Caleb… because, like I said, Caleb sprung to life fully formed.

Alpha Pussy: Caleb springs fully in a lot of areas. I would love to borrow him for an evening. Has writing about sex improved your own sex life?

Lynne: Um… I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but no. I um, lived through my characters when I wrote this book. Now that I have a loving, gorgeous, wonderful man (that gives Caleb a run for his money) my sex life doesn’t need a boost. LOL But I think it has the potential to.

Alpha Pussy: You should let him pick a scene to re-enact with you for his birthday, holidays, or just because it's Saturday. Your story Hooking Up burned into my head the first time I read it. INCREDIBLY HOT!!! Tell me where you got the idea.

Lynne: Wow… years and years ago, my sisters took me to dinner for my birthday. There was a man staring into his drink as though the melting ice held the answers to every problem. I scribbled something down on a napkin. Later, when I found the napkin, I started tossing ideas around. Why was he there? What were his problems? When you meet Glenn in HOOKING UP, he’s staring into his scotch.

Alpha Pussy: Just thinking about the beginning of that story makes me want to go read the rest of it...aloud to my man and have him take notes. If you were to get snowed in with any one man of your choice, who would it be and why? Or will you be greedy and choose more than one?

Lynne: LOL. That’s easy. My man. ; )

Alpha Pussy: Wrap it all up by giving your best tip for #BJFriday.

Lynne: I actually asked my significant other about this one. He raised his eyebrow and smiled. So my tip for you…Take ownership. It’s yours, learn it, enjoy it to the max and so will he…oh, and loosen your grip from time to time. ; ) Trust me.

Excellent tip, Lynne! Thank you for the fun and naughty interview! Next time I'll be sure to tie you up during.

Be sure to check out Lynne Roberts' site where you can purchase her truly scintillating stories. Believe me, you'll want to stop by the toy store first.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

I'm a Prejudiced Bitch

I'm all about not judging a book by it's cover. What matters to me is who a person is, not what she/he looks like or comes from. My relationship with my mate is one the standard society considers to be an alternative lifestyle. I'm accepting of everyone as long as they aren't candidates for the Hall of Douchebags or insufferable bitches, so I admit I consider myself fairly unprejudiced.

That self-view was challenged the other day when a friend confessed that she was in a Dom/Sub relationship in which SHE was the sub.

I freaked.

He was an abusive asshole taking advantage of her. How dare he TRAIN her? When the fuck did we end back in the 50's where the good little woman flits around doing the man of the house's bidding? Didn't she know she was worth more than that? How could she let a man put her in any kind of position where there's violence? Give me 5 minutes with this man and I'd show him what a REAL dominant is.

I'd fucking beat his ass black and blue.

It was at this point the realization hit me. I'm a prejudiced bitch. I was fine with a Dom/Sub relationship just as long as the woman was the Dom. I despised the idea of any woman underneath a man's heel.

We all view life shaded by our experiences, and I have been subjected to several appallingly awful men hellbent on destroying my will and keeping me under their control. So when I heard about a man being in power, my mind automatically took me to viewing it as an abusive relationship. Especially since the only Doms I regularly communicate with are women.

What I had failed to consider was the fact that my friend wasn't forced to obey this man, she had chosen to. Just like my pet puts his heart, soul, mind and body into my control and trusts me to take care of him. While I wouldn't hesitate to punish my pet, I would never cause him harm or allow harm to befall him. Our relationship sometimes can be one giant power struggle, but it's not because either one of us desires to truly hurt the other. I had to recognize that this Dom didn't lack my mindset simply because he was a man.

One of the aspects I love the most about being in an FLR is the absolute love and trust between my pet and I. Yet, this is not exclusive to an FLR. Being a Dom is a huge responsibility. You must care for your Subs needs all while setting the rules and being consistent in upholding them. (Because Subs can be very needy and tend to get very bratty when their needs aren't being met.) It's exhausting at times, but extremely rewarding.

I will end this by saying to my friend who has no idea that she sparked this blog post, I'm sorry. I apologize for instantly trivializing your choice and your happiness by allowing my prejudices to take over. I wish you nothing but the best and thank you for sharing your journey with me.

And if he ever does abuse you, I'll fucking knock his teeth down his throat.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Cup of Controversy

I love my new coffee cup. It looks fucking cool, holds a lot of coffee and I found it in the Target Christmas clearance section for only $0.99.

So why am I blogging about it?

An interesting thing happened when I posted the picture of it on Twitpic. All the girls loved it. All the boys hated it. My pet even went so far as to say he was going to break the awful thing. I've warned him if anything happens to my cup, his ass will look just as striped. I want to know, though, is there a gender bias to my cup?

I put it to all of you, out of sheer, blatant curiosity. Ugly or awesome?

Please leave your response in a comment and please leave if you are male or female.